Never across in my mind that being a mother is a big transition in my life time. Bear in mind that I am a selfish, workaholic and ambitious person (as my father claim). As per now I've been enjoying my part as a working mom. Able to spend play time with my only one precious 10 month daughter. and pursue my carrier (the truth is to get money to shopping). Despite the main reason (read: money for shopping), there's some reason I love to work:
- By working I able to keep my insanity, no need to 24/7 facing with house chores that I m not good at it.
- Meet with my work collague chatting, erm basically simply meeting with people makes you refresh. And knowing world from different perspective, its keep amaze me (most of it in a positive way).
- To able acomplish a target or able to put some good value in my workplace or being appreciate by your superior base on your work, for me its a positive value that keep me energized each day.
- I can always learn a new thing.
But recently I work with different feel. Since I know I need to be a full time mom. Her grandma need to go back to Indonesia, and not able to help me to take care baby J.
Daycare is not an option for my husband. Baby J heart is his only main concern. Ya.. I agree with him, that as her mom. I need to take care my baby, also mentoring and guide her. But here I am, I'm agree to disagree.
How can we settle all the bill.
Dont forget we still rent a house, not own it.
So how the insurance, education fund, and retirement plan? (any update? ermm..)
Its not Im being a heartless mother but I also worry about how our financial family later once we cut half of the resource. The spend will be the same or maybe more. And how can we able to save some of our income for buying house or retirement or education.
My Heavenly Father, I bow down in my knees. Humbly put all my praud and ego. As I deeply depend on Your grace alone. You are my provider, since begining from my ancestor You always bless them. As in the bible said, You wont leave us alone and I trully believe that You are the same God who guide Israel from Egipt to the promise land. And You will guide my family to Your promises. Give me and my family power to conquer the fear and doubt that i see right now. Pleae forgive me for any sin and mistake that we commited. Let us see Your big plan opon us. Dont let us walk in our way, but let us only walk in Your way. Let or family be a blessing for our community.
Dear God.... thank you and thank you.... Thanks Jesus...
- By working I able to keep my insanity, no need to 24/7 facing with house chores that I m not good at it.
- Meet with my work collague chatting, erm basically simply meeting with people makes you refresh. And knowing world from different perspective, its keep amaze me (most of it in a positive way).
- To able acomplish a target or able to put some good value in my workplace or being appreciate by your superior base on your work, for me its a positive value that keep me energized each day.
- I can always learn a new thing.
But recently I work with different feel. Since I know I need to be a full time mom. Her grandma need to go back to Indonesia, and not able to help me to take care baby J.
Daycare is not an option for my husband. Baby J heart is his only main concern. Ya.. I agree with him, that as her mom. I need to take care my baby, also mentoring and guide her. But here I am, I'm agree to disagree.
How can we settle all the bill.
Dont forget we still rent a house, not own it.
So how the insurance, education fund, and retirement plan? (any update? ermm..)
Its not Im being a heartless mother but I also worry about how our financial family later once we cut half of the resource. The spend will be the same or maybe more. And how can we able to save some of our income for buying house or retirement or education.
My Heavenly Father, I bow down in my knees. Humbly put all my praud and ego. As I deeply depend on Your grace alone. You are my provider, since begining from my ancestor You always bless them. As in the bible said, You wont leave us alone and I trully believe that You are the same God who guide Israel from Egipt to the promise land. And You will guide my family to Your promises. Give me and my family power to conquer the fear and doubt that i see right now. Pleae forgive me for any sin and mistake that we commited. Let us see Your big plan opon us. Dont let us walk in our way, but let us only walk in Your way. Let or family be a blessing for our community.
Dear God.... thank you and thank you.... Thanks Jesus...
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